| Hesitant |
Apr. 25th, 2003|07:23 pm |
Being less mobile and travelling on public transport has given me a new perspective on things, I think.
I'm used to just breezing my way through journeys. I walk fast, I'm confident in crowds and although I'm not built like the proverbial brick outhouse I was once described as looking like "a bit of a bruiser" so people generally don't barge into me. Because I'm careful not to throw my weight around and usually hold doors open for people and give up seats and so on, I don't see myself as one of the 'problem' people and I guess I assume I'm pretty average in my levels of confidence and so on.
But these last two days, hobbling around on this excuse for a foot, have given me a different perspective. Instead of plunging along pavements and through crowded ticket halls in an arrow-straight line, safe in the knowledge I could dodge anyone who didn't dodge me first, I've been crawling along as people have flooded past and around me in a great tide. I've shied away from anyone who's even looked like they might come close to treading on my foot. I've had to pick my route with care. Someone - a young black businessman - offered me his seat on a bus. I've even caught people watching my limp with curious sympathy, then jerking their eyes away from me when I spot them. In short, all my able-bodied-male-in-the-prime-of-his-life confidence has evaporated.
Is this what it's like to be elderly? Is this what it's like to be disabled?
I don't think I like it much. |
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